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A Bad Feminist

In class this week I admitted that I sometimes feel like a bad feminist for wanting to marry, settle down, quit my job, and have children. I have held this belief as long as I can remember. The only big-dream-job that I can recall desiring is to become a ballerina. This I held onto firmly until I entered the 1st grade.

Another woman posted here saying that should have followed her dream to become a veterinarian. I will never feel such regret. I do not want to be extraordinary. I want to do math, at some giant corporation where I am just another worker bee keeping the machine (by “machine” I mean society, corporations, and big business) running. I do not plan to change the world in my career.

My romantic heart does yearn for more, but that has never coincided with a job. Rather, I want to raise a family. I hope to adopt children, and care for foster children; maybe run my own daycare out of my house for the neighbors. I don’t hope to be a CEO, nor will I ever run for president. But that doesn’t mean I don’t believe in equality. I will support any woman who breaks down the stereotypes so long as she is capable of the job she is after. [Side note, I believe Sarah Palin was not capable of being Vice President but that has nothing to do with her womanhood.]

The reason I feel like a bad feminist is because I am not trying to climb the corporate ladder. My aspirations are elsewhere, they lie in raising a family. For this reason I feel that I am doing a disservice to the woman in generations after me who worry they will not be able to break down the wall – the glass ceiling, the mindset that has kept women paid less than their male counter parts.

But feminists come in all forms and occupations; even stay at home mothers with masters degrees in mathematics.


  1. lysaleh says:

    You’re not a bad feminist at all. I completely understand where you’re coming from. I personally would like to finish my four year graduate degree after undergrad and then start a family while working, but having aspirations to raise a family is wonderful, nothing to feel bad about!

  2. shaniperk says:

    Bravo for you!!! I applaud you for stating what you want. Everyone should understand this. It’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to stay at home & raise your children and care for your family. It’s what YOU want. Everyone has different dreams and yours are no different. I wish I could be a stay at home mom! I’m trying to find a rich man that will allow my husband and I to be stay at home husband and wife! LOL!

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