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The Bar/Club Scene

In my last blog, I wanted to talk about a very touchy subject. I have never been to a bar or a club and don’t think I ever will. From what I have seen in movies however, many a times, women get treated like they are a piece of meat. Many men go there thinking they’re going to “get some” even before they start drinking. What I want to explore is how we can build a society where women are respected and men learn to respect (not that there aren’t many who don’t). Before this can occur, we have to dig deep and find the roots of this problem. Many women state that a woman can wear whatever she wants and not be “asking for it.” For those who believe that, I want to know how that applies when so many women in the media are portrayed getting ready to go to the club or whatever, talking to her girlfriends maybe after a breakup or something with the intentions of going to bars or clubs for the purpose of “getting some.” How can this double standard be resolved? I know of many women who dress sexy because it makes them feel good about themselves yet the message the media is giving is that every woman who dresses this way is doing it for a purpose. Indirectly, society is saying its okay to rape a woman for example if she dresses this way. Being that intoxication, if not drugs, are involved in the bar/club scene, I ask, why would a woman go dressed like that, given the stereotypes that society creates, and not expect to be treated like a piece of meat (she doesn’t have to be raped)? Some very educated men that I know go to bar/club scenes to find women that are easy. I know for sure many women don’t go to these places thinking they are that. But what happens when society creates these stereotypes? I remember a student in our class commenting on how marriage is not seen as something so important nowadays to men because women are so easy. It might be a statement that many people disagree with but the reality is, he is not the first man I have heard say that. Men from all backgrounds, not just conservative men, hold this view. Are we as women just suppose to accept that? Or even present ourselves as that? I think many women want the to have everything these days. They want to act in behaviors that make not just men, but other human beings question their motives yet still be respected like a lady. Truth is, that’s not going to happen. Just like when a teenager acts up or anyone as a matter of fact goes against what normal logic says, is treated differently, why don’t we expect women to be treated that way. Sometimes I feel that we women want to be treated go about life without any consequences (good or bad) just based on something disney movies put in our heads from a young age.

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