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Survivor of Physical Abuse

After reading chapter 10 I found myself revisiting a part of my life in which  I was one of the women you have read about in the chapter. You may ask your self why would I want to put this out there for people to read and let people know what happen to me, is because I’m a survivor and like the women in The Invisible War I have a story to tell. I also relate to what you have read in the chapter. What they say about low self-esteem is true and that was me for years. I saw my-self being isolated from friends and loves and I was ashamed of what was happening to me. How I got there I’m not sure. Don’t think because you don’t come around the ones you love  they don’t know whats going on, because they do.

They may not saying any thing but they know.  After I left my husband my best friend told me that she knew that I was being abused but I never told her. I asked her for years how did she find what was happening to me and she said ” That’s o-k I knew.” Until the day she died she never told me who told her, but she knew. So you see ladies and men you may think you are keeping a secret, but you’re not. You may ask your self why did  I stay , I stayed because of the fifth reason on pg. 520, because I didn’t think I could afford to leave.

On pg. 518 it talks about women not getting a reality checks about their situation well I got two. One was when my then sister-in-law made a comment about my girls getting older and what all my husband and I could do now that the kids where getting older. That was my first wake up call. He had the 20’s and the 30’s I’d be damn if was getting the 40’s. The primary reason I found the courage to leave was because he started to hurt my girls. Because of him I had to take my girls to a physiologist for a while. I’m married again and I celebrated 10 years last July but this one walks a very thin line.The gloves came off   with this one and my sister tells him all the time the first one taught me very well. I did not writ this to get sympathy, but to let others know that there is help out there and you don’t have to stay in that kind of situation.  Always keep this in mind it is not your fault and you did not deserve to be treated that way.


  1. lekwatson says:

    Hats off to you for taking the steps need to free yourself and your family. But most of all being a good example for your girls.

  2. awiedmaier says:

    I am very proud of you for doing what was best for your children and yourself. I too, experienced an abusive relationship and divorced my husband after 22 years of marriage. He is an alcoholic and it was the most difficult time of my life. I know firsthand how difficult it is to break away. But it can be done, and is being done daily by many strong women. My daughter often speaks of how proud she is of me for having the courage to be on my own. A lot of women stay because it’s too hard to leave. I know I set the right example for my children.

  3. zhassan2013 says:

    I’m very sorry this happened to you. I know many women are in your situation but it takes guts to do what you did. I hope you’re where you want to be in life now.

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