In chapter seven of Family Systems, Family Lives, Reading 53 Marriage and Love, Emma Goldman speaks about the differences in the meanings of love and marriage. These words may be thought of as synonyms to most people but Goldman explains they are actually antagonistic to one another. Goldman believes that love and marriage are popular notions and like most popular notions they are based mainly on superstitions.
Every girl is raised to believe that the best day of her life is her wedding day. Every little girls plans out her wedding and hopes for it to be as magical as she imagines it to be, however, this only happens if she is a “good girl” suitable enough for a wealthy empty-minded man. Marriage, Goldman believes is the institution in which a woman suppresses her womanly desires in exchange for a ring and a two car garage. She even compares marriage to an insurance plan, saying that your husband is the premium and “she pays for it with her name, her privacy, her self-respect, her very life.” I personally loved this reading, Goldman highlights what every girl (sensible individual that is) who has ever truly thought about the cons of marriage.
Is marriage a notion of love or a piece of paper which grants you extra priveleges? I personally feel marriage is very important. I mean people have fought, and are still fighting, for the right to marry their loved one. However, I believe the fantasy view of a “perfect” marriage is non-existent.
Referring back to what Goldman was pointing out in her reading, I do not follow nor agree with the typical view of marriage life that even my own culture poses. I believe marriage should be an equal partnership, not an “insurance plan”. You take the power to share your life with another human being because you love them for all that they are and not what they have. Lately, it seems as if marriages start just as quick as they end, just look at the length of Kim Kardashian’s marriage.