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Marriage and Love by Emma Goldman

While reading this article I found myself to be a bit torn between two main points the author attempted to make. First, she mentions that love and marriage have absolutely nothing to do with one another. Secondly, she says that women only get married to find a husband to take of care them. I couldn’t disagree with her more. The statements that she made would be true if we were living back in the 1940s or 50s when women did search for a “good man” to marry. By a “good man,” I mean a successful man to provide for her and their future children. He didn’t have to necessarily have to love her unconditionally.

In the present day, things are much different as women actually help their mate or spouse to provide for the household. There are so many successful educated women today that they’re no longer looking for a husband to simply take care of them but to build something together as a team. They ultimately want to marry someone who is just as successful as they are and who can bring something to the table as well. A little girl’s ultimate goal is still to grow up and get married but just based on a different foundation. It’s safe to say that today’s marriages are more based on love than money as it starts off. Today’s divorce rate compared to back in the day explains it all. It simply proves that when people fall out of love they get divorced and move on and in the past the wife would have no choice but to stay because she depended on him completely.

She also touches on how men are taught from a very young age to be independent and self supporting. I agree one hundred percent with this statement because I witnessed a young boy get yelled at by his father when he began to whine and cry about not being able to play with toy. The father told his son to stop whining like a little girl, nothing is ever given to a boy when he grows up, you have to be tougher than that, a little girl can always grow up and find a man to take care of her, and boys don’t have it that easy. From then on my perception of the situation has been much different because I hadn’t realized just how much pressure that had been put on little boys at such a young age.


3 Comments

  1. lekwatson says:

    Yes you are right, times are changing and today little girls are being taught to be self-sufficient so they don’t grow up and need to look for husbands or significant others to take care of them. This way a relationship can be built on love and mutual respect.

  2. alemara123 says:

    The idea of marriage has been changed. As you mentioned, in the past a woman was looking for a husband to take care of her needs financially because the man was her only source for money. The standards have been changed today. Due to knowledge, education, and having jobs women are not looking for just a husband. Today, the first thing a woman look for is love, which I think is important and it is the successful key in marriage.

  3. bs says:

    So you base a single incident with some redneck father treating his child unfairly and mocking what boys/girls should expect when they get older, to be 100 percent agreed? A single incident? And marriage back in the 40s was never about love but money? Wow… Ahem, a divorce was almost unheard of back then not because of who the bread winner was, but because the 40s were still following The Word. Stop teaching this bullshit activist crap that simply isnt true. To get a divorce means to break God’s rule of marriage. Today, The Word isnt followed 1/10th of one percent compared to 70 years ago. Stop feeding the youth with false imagery of past times. If you said something along the lines of, ‘back in the 40s women had a difficult time sharing the expenditure of finances because BACK THEN, men were the ones making money and didnt usually share in financial decision making’. Thats a more believable statement. Now I see why theres so much gripe with whats being taught these days. Opinions, not facts.

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